Crashed

With a title like that you just know this can't be a good post right? Well, it isn't...

Last night on my way home from work, I was involved in a car accident. Maybe involved is the wrong word...I was the cause of the accident, I was the totaled car in the accident, I was the royally screwed party (albeit by my own screwing...that doesn't sound right, but you know what I mean) in the accident.

I had just merged onto I45 and was stuck in a pile of cars waiting to use a one lane exit. Anyway, being my patient self, I was ready to move over into the next lane where traffic was going faster. I saw that the car ahead of me had the same idea, but we had at least one and possibly two car lengths between us. We moved over and just as I checked my side view mirror to see if I was clear, I hit her.

Once we got pulled over to the side of the road, I got out and immediately asked about her. She said that she was fine, and then she explained that a school bus cut her off to merge so she had to slow down. While she said she braked (I don't know...I was looking the side view mirror) when I hit her there were no brake lights on. She admitted that she was just putting her foot back on the gas when I hit her. After settling that, and deciding to call the police, I got my first good look at my car. My crunched up front end car. My leaking fluid all over the road car. My crap this can't be good car. Have I gotten across the point that the car isn't in good shape?

After what seemed like forever, the state trooper came, I was given the ticket (of course...), the kinda scary but very nice tow truck driver hooked up my car, and a friend came and got me, and then I had to call my parents. The most unfortunate part of the whole deal...my car probably isn't worth what it will take to fix it. I'd lay money on the fact that a new car is in my immediate future. While that prospect does excite me, the budget side is a little frightening. I like a cushion in the bank and this will turn my cushion into a thin piece of mosquito netting. Sigh...I just got sad.

I took today off from work (main reason...can't walk the 30 mile commute) to get started on the claims process and trying to find a rental car. You would think that should have been easy, but with this Hurricane Ike business (have I mentioned how disillusioned I am by hurricanes now?) there are practically no cars to be found. Thankfully, the fourth place I called has three full size sedans to pick from...I think I'm getting the Hyundai Sonata. *EDIT...just found out it is going to be a Toyota Camry that I'm getting...*Anyway, at least I'll have some transportation until I know what my options are for the car.

So, as my mom said this morning, I'll have to dig deep and find my well hidden cache of patience and ride this thing out. I'm normally a glass half empty kind of girl, but I'm trying to see the positives here...I'm okay! I might get a new car...which I've been thinking about and working toward! While it isn't how I'd choose to spend it, I do have a cushion so that this won't break me. (That doesn't get a !...) I have a friend that didn't mind driving out of her way to come and get me! I have parents that love me and would have given up their plans for the weekend to come down and help me through this if I thought I'd needed them to!

All in all...I'm still very blessed and for that I'm very thankful!

Who Is The Boss?

The other night DF and I were doing an equally great job of turning each other on, but I was being bossy and taking some control. This being the boss, while new for me, is sort of a power trip. I was just getting into my groove of giving directions and taking charge when DF tossed back, "Just ride the damn thing." I can assure you that a purely feminine laugh with undertones of "not a chance buddy...I have you exactly where I want you" slipped out at the command. You ladies have to know exactly what I'm talking about...

And there in lies my question (or questions as it turns out)...

Ladies...how often do you wrestle control from your guy? If you're more of the submissive (I couldn't think of a better word but you know what I mean...the one that usually follows the lead rather than gives it) do you find it easy to slip into the "boss" role?

Dudes...do you like it when your lady takes over? If you're the more dominant type, is it easy to let her have the control?

I really should write something about how this whole line of thought came about shouldn't I?

In The Aftermath

Thank you to all of you that have wished and prayed for my safety. I appreciate it very much! I am fine and safe. While I do live very close to Houston and my town was in the path of Ike, I didn't get as much damage as other places. There were several downed trees and limbs, but there wasn't damage to my apartment or car. Even though I weathered Ike, the continued power outage was simply too much to handle. Sunday morning I packed up my kitty and we headed to my parents.

As of now, I'll be off work until Monday with the possibility of longer. Right now so much hinges on when the power is restored. Anyway, because I'm at my parents' home, I have decided not to blog from their computer as The Naughty One. I'm not sure when I'll be back home with access to my computer, so for now I'm relying on the kindness of a friend to post for me.

Please continue to lift up everyone who has been effected by Ike in some way. There is a lot of destruction and devastation going on right now. Again, thanks to all of you thoughtful, kind people for thinking about me!

But I Have A Good Reason...

I don't live in Florida, but I do live in Texas...right in the path of Ike as a matter of fact. So, I won't be blogging for a few days. Hopefully, I won't wash or get blown away! Seriously, keep everyone who has been or will be effected by Ike in your thoughts.

Hello Old Friend

Everywhere I turn these days I run into someone spouting the virtues of a vibrator. Just to prove my point...here and here. Also, the topic recently came up in a group of friends trying to decide if a vibrator was an appropriate bridal shower gift. We decided that it was because the couple is...adventurous shall we say.

Now, I am the kind of girl that doesn't have such a loving relationship with my vibrator. Yes, you read that right...singular. I only own one vibrator. It isn't some freakishly accurate phallus shaped thing. There are no balls or animals made out of gel attached to it. It is what the manufactures call the Plain Jane. Well, if you're interested, you can see it in action here. See, nothing fancy...girly pink, slender except for that egg shaped thing, and smooth. I bought it for its "make you squirt" guarantee. I wonder if it is too late to get my money back...

I play with it occasionally, but mostly it resides in my nightstand drawer. I'm sure it has a grand ole' time in there with the remotes, lip balm, and various pens and pads of paper. While it works fine, I just prefer my fingers. I've thought about bringing it out during playtime with DF, but we're kinda...fast...so again the fingers just work best.

But...I've gotten intimately reacquainted with my old friend Vibe. Saturday afternoon I was in the mood to come. Not just any kind of coming, but I wanted to feel that pressure inside of me, feel my walls tightening around something, and that delicious pop feeling when there is a withdrawal. After digging out the toy cleaner and spiffing Vibe up, I was set to go. I started with some soft stroking of my lips and imagining a little role expansion (more about that later!). It worked like a charm. I was slick in minutes.

I twisted Vibe's end and soon had a sweet buzzing started. I spread my thighs, arched my hips, and slid Vibe inside. I don't think I sighed and heard angels singing, but darn did it feel wonderful. I pressed that thing inside till I thought I'd break something and then began the twist. And the sliding almost out and the all the way back in. I found that the wider I spread my lips the sharper the sensations inside along the walls of my pussy. It wasn't long until I couldn't resist rubbing my clit. The orgasm that followed was simply amazing.

And for the girl that doesn't pay much attention to her vibrator...well, let's just say we've been very close the last few nights. Perhaps the trend will continue or I just might settle back into the comfortable familiarity of my nimble fingers. But for the moment...I've a very satisfied woman.

Funny Stuff

I haven't decided if this is really dirty or not, but it sure did make me laugh! There are some words that I just can't say with a straight face...wiener being one of them...so I crack up just reading it. There is something probably dirty about that...

Revelations

When I first started this blog it was with the intentions of having a place where I could explore my sexuality in a "safe" environment. I also wanted to be able to share some of my writing as several had told me it shouldn't be kept to myself. Along the way, there have been a lot of surprises...mostly all good. To name a few, I found that posing my body, mostly in the nude, for a photo wasn't terrifying. I discovered that posting those mostly nude photos was actually very liberating. I've met some very nice, wonderful people.

Then, I had a somewhat sharp attack of conscience. I've made no secret that except for brief releases, I am a good girl and this so called naughty side stays firmly out of sight. It dawns on me that perhaps it might come across as if I'm ashamed to have decidedly naughty or kinky or base desires. That isn't true...but I am not used to sharing those things in such a public forum. Anyway, I felt that maybe I'd gotten caught up in the freeness of it all. It sort of reminds me of the baby that is starting to walk. Those first steps are kind of wobbly and then with praise and encouragement she lets go of the coffee table and starts walking. Then suddenly she realizes that she's not holding on to anything and falls to her butt terrified of having let go.

Well...I fell to my butt terrified of what I'd exposed of myself. It wasn't just to the kind readers that are always encouraging and thoughtful with their comments. It wasn't just to the few nasty readers who left some hurtful words. It wasn't just to DF. I felt exposed to myself and frankly it was sort of a shock.

I've always been the kind to run like the wind when things became complicated or confusing. I never want to be the first to voice a new feeling in the relationship for fear that I'm the only one feeling it. I suppose you could say that I'm a shallow person...never wanting to dig or feel too deep. You get hurt when you feel to deeply and I hate getting hurt. So, when a probing question came, my answer was honest and gasp...more than surface level...the urge to close shop and run came swift.

I felt that more than what I wanted to be revealed was as plain as day for anyone clicking by. I needed to step back and reconsider what I was letting go of here. Perhaps it seems down right silly to be this emotional about a blog, but I've been honest here and I let my emotions bleed right into so many posts. I might not know your face if I saw you on the street, but you are real people and you do know an awful lot about me. For the good girl it was a scary thought.

But, one of the best things to come from reflection and thinking is the revelation. I am exactly who I am and probably exactly who I should be. I am the young woman who holds down a darn respectable job, who influences lives on a daily basis, who loves her family and values friendships beyond all else. I am a spiritual person who believes in someone far greater than myself. I have values and morals that I'd fight to defend. I'm also the young woman who craves the touch of fingers that bring me to orgasm. I am the one who enjoys the sting of a bite or the slap of a hand across my ass. This mouth can say the dirtiest of things and the sound of a rough growl as he comes sounds like music in my ear. A few of my desires and tastes run toward the dark and base. Still...it is all me.

I feared for a while that this blog would have to go as I couldn't seem to balance out the good and the naughty. I tried...several weeks of silence and I still feel a tug to write and share. My revelation...I am who I am and fighting one or trying to be all the other is pointless. From here on out there has to be a blend and a balance. There are some things that I simply need to keep a little bit more private if for no one else but myself. There are some things that can be shared that are simply not dark or kinky but are things that just bring me joy.

It is funny because in a way I might be exposing even more of myself. But, it feels okay and right. So, thank you to those of you who stuck around and didn't want me to just float away on the wind. And dear blog...welcome back!